It’s game time! What happens when the twins are handed random words and zero preparation? Chaos. Cinema references. Catholic guilt. And, somehow, emotional honesty.

In this audience-suggested episode from London’s own “Captain Good Times,” Brett and Royce pull words from a hat and blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. One word leads to a shocking family confession about inheritance. Another goes full “Wizard of Oz” (because of course it does). One discussion reveals white-knuckle movie trauma and the daily anxiety of simply existing. And in yet another, let’s just say the gays and the parents both feel seen.

Along the way, there are tangents about refrigerator magnets, Cape Fear, spiders, social media, Catholicism, and whether bourbon should be considered a co-host. The surprise is not how different the brothers are, but how often their minds land in the same strange ballpark.

Free association turns into free therapy, and the result is funny, revealing, and just a little Jungian (Brett insists “Jungian” is a word). Play along with the brothers and enjoy listening to their mind games!

Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

In this episode, Brett and Royce tackle The Big C (yes, that one) with honesty, humor, and a whole lot of heart. Drawing from their own diagnoses, personal history, and years spent living alongside cancer, the twins talk openly about the fear, the awkward conversations, and the moments no one prepares you for.

They share stories of telling people the hard news, navigating wildly inappropriate medical moments, and discovering that “gallows humor” can be both a coping mechanism and a lifeline. Along the way, they uncover some surprising upsides: unexpected kindness, deep gratitude, and the strange joy of being told “you look amazing” (we forgive you).

This episode does not minimize how terrifying cancer can be, but it makes space for laughter, love, and connection right alongside the fear. A reminder that there is no “right” way to go through something awful, only the way that helps you persevere and remain the best version of yourself…with a lot of help (and yes, even laughter) along the way. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Julia Sweeney’s Cameo message to Brett

Parenting: one brother does it, one brother does not, and both have opinions!

In this episode, Brett and Royce take on parenting with honesty, intensity, and plenty of laughs. Brett shares what it is really like raising kids, from firm boundaries and formal titles to the terrifying emergence of his alter ego, “Mama Bear.” Royce brings his perspective as a proud non-parent, offering observations about why kids act the way they do and demonstrating why he has no business being a parent in the first place. Together they tackle “friendship parenting,” discipline strategies, and developing “the look.” 

The episode also introduces a brand-new segment, “That’s My Myrna!”, featuring the twins’ mother, who delivers wisdom, stories, flying-slipper lore, and a deeply moving reflection on what it means to raise decent humans. It is funny, chaotic, and emotional (just like their mother).

It’s a love letter to parents doing the hard work now for the sake of the future. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Meet our Mom! (December 2025)

Inspired by a listener who bravely asked, “Why didn’t anyone tell us adulthood would be like this?”, Brett and Royce dive headfirst into the strange, snack-filled, mildly alarming reality of being grown-ups. Topics include Count Chocula as a gateway cocktail (with Kahlúa, because…adulthood), the crushing disappointment of staying up late, and the shocking realization that freedom mostly means wanting to go to bed at 9:30pm. The twins debate whether adulthood is an age, a mindset, or simply the moment you realize older people might actually know things, even as you forget your spouse’s name and lose your keys in the freezer. They cover bodily betrayals, parenting vs. not parenting, adult-only resorts, “adult movies” (poor phrasing from Brett), and the true gift of aging: caring less about what does not matter. Beneath the jokes is a reassuring truth: there is no correct way to be an adult. If you are figuring it out, forgetting things, trying new stuff anyway, and eating kiddie cereal the way you want, you are doing it right. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Armed with bubbly courage and a stack of mystery prompts, Brett and Royce take turns riffing on whatever the other brother pulls from the hat. No prep, mild fear, maximum chaos. Expect airport anthropology (will she make the gate?), cinematic “improvements” that should probably be illegal, and the great bug-snack debate no one asked for. Between sips, they veer from time-machine regrets to parenting truths (kids are miracles… who complain about Indian food). It’s loose, tipsy, and oddly heartfelt. If you like your laughs with pulp and bubbles, this one pours heavy. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Brett and Royce unwrap Christmas in all its sparkling, chaotic glory. They go from childhood He-Man trauma to adult cookie-related breakdowns in a festive episode that’s equal parts nostalgia, sarcasm, and holiday warmth. They revisit the Great Castle Grayskull Incident, roast the annual Christmas cookie meltdown (“Christmas hell, but make it buttery”), and confess their family’s bizarre truckstop-at-midnight tradition (nothing says Christmas like the Pope on a coin-operated TV next to stuffed wildlife). They also tackle the other big holiday tradition: lying to children about Santa. Beneath the jokes, the twins land somewhere sweet: reminding us why we endure the stress, the chaos, the baking, and the lies: because Christmas, at its best, is wonderful. If your holiday season is equal parts magic and madness, cookies and crying, Mariah and mayhem, welcome home! And welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Ana Gasteyer performs "Sugar and Booze" (Late Night with Seth Meyers)

Cher performs “DJ Play A Christmas Song” (Live from iHeart Radio's Jingle Ball 2023)

Brett swears he’ll keep a story short (Royce knows better), then recounts a night at a tiny bar in Sullivan County, PA that turns into a masterclass in seeing the best in all people. Expect the Western-saloon record scratch, a surprise round of drinks from a stranger, a tipsy sing-along to the Gatlin Brothers, and that sweet moment when the jukebox hits play and the whole room feels lighter. From there, the twins tussle over the Golden Rule (spoiler alert: Royce hates it) and unpack how assumptions harden when we only live inside our own safe, familiar bubbles. The takeaway is tender: most folks are trying to be good to one another, and stepping into someone else’s world can shift your own, especially if the other person is buying the drinks. This is The Best We Can Do!

You asked, they answered. Brett and Royce finally tackle the question they’ve been asked more than any other: “What’s it like being a twin?” From who’s “older” (by a tragic 13 minutes) to mistaken identity punches and one disastrously fake red-carpet appearance, the brothers share the myths, mix-ups, and magic of twinhood. Along the way, we learn about “same thing, different color” childhood fashion trauma, a possibly psychic nosebleed, and why Brett owes Clarabelle an apology. Beneath the laughs, this episode lands somewhere tender: what it means to be known so deeply that words aren’t needed (no, not psychic, just love). If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to have a built-in best friend who is willing to take a punch for you, this one’s for you. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

This one’s a showdown between Brett’s love of dinner jackets, fine wine, and French cuisine and Royce’s deep devotion to hoodies, free refills, and restaurants with pictures in the menus. The twins relive dueling graduation dinners: Maison Robert’s coq au vin vs. Bugaboo Creek’s animatronic bison. They then spiral into first-class vs. coach, bibs vs. no bibs, and whether a tablecloth is a promise or a threat. Along the way they discuss their childhood home decorated with aggressively posed taxidermy, a tie-tying confession (hello, half-Windsor), and a spirited debate about formal vs. informal language…plus selective profanity. Under the roast, there’s a sweet understanding: your “fancy” might be French Pastries or it might be French Fries, and both are fabulous. If you’ve ever argued about dress codes, you’ll feel very seen. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Brett and Royce turn the mics on each other for a no-prep, anything-goes interview that ranges from childhood selves to the state of humanity (plus a detour through state capitals and the mystery 13th apostle). You’ll hear Royce unpack social anxiety, curiosity, and why people are somehow both fragile and resilient, while Brett debates whether the world got ruder or we just got wi-fi. The brothers talk candidly (and darkly amusingly) about their parallel cancer journeys, including the infamous PSA 940 vs. “Five” reveal and chemo room comedy that didn’t always land. Expect warm brotherly love, gentle (ok, mostly gentle) roasting, and big questions answered with bourbon-adjacent honesty. If you like interviews where the guests know all the dirt and still show up, you’re home. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Let’s eavesdrop on our first conversation with Brett and Royce! In this breezy premiere, Brett and Royce introduce themselves with equal parts affection and roasted honest. They each offer a heartfelt compliment, then a merciless “growth opportunity.” Listen for their origin-story moment (which involves eavesdroppers in Wine Country), sibling banter that swings from warm to wicked, and the real, quietly present reality that both brothers are living with cancer, a truth they treat with blunt humor and tenderness. Expect jokes, dad-bragging, stubbornness, and a surprisingly earnest reason they decided to make time for each other. If you like family stories that are funny, a little rude, and honest about life’s hard stuff, this one’s for you. Welcome to The Best We Can Do!

Meet Brett and Royce, your hosts for The Best We Can Do! Join us as we share why we are doing this ridiculous thing in the first place. What makes us similar? What makes us different? Why should you care? Let's find out!